Thursday, October 05, 2017

My perception on God!

Lot has changed with my perception on things, as I keep learning and experience life people do not notice it easily or I haven’t exhibited or chance to do. Being mostly home bound, except my parents no one observes things at close or interested to look into but with each passing phase the transformation happens as I ponder over things. One such thing was stop believing there's  God!  This wasn’t a decision of all of sudden but layer by layer the thoughts inbuilt within and it isn’t a reflection of my frustration of being disabled or anxiety. It’s a conscious decision truly based on rational thoughts and inner feeling.  Perhaps it could be my inability to obtain the feel of god but I wasn’t blindfold to stamp against others feelings and at same time I’m reasonable to feel unlike.

I don’t hide or deny that I believed God once when I wasn’t truly conscious about things or understood life. Though I don’t say I quite aware everything, but from my understanding which perhaps wrong, I couldn’t feel the god or hold faith. I might be wrong if I seek evidence and definitely there’s a power behind the rotation of earth and universe setting, but I couldn’t come to a term there’s god behind this exist. The transformation began within me more than a decade ago and many silent moments and questions answered me the same. Though my perception has changed I continue to capture or record things related to devotion or idol worshipping, and it doesn’t matter upon what belief it hold, I can’t deny the reality happening around me.

But still many things haven’t changed or turned down and I like going to big temples not for worship but to admire the craftsmanship and take photos on the architecture and sculptors. I see big temples or churches as a landmark of history and marvel at same and some are beautiful (even they’re small shrines or mosque) to watch. I still get to smear sacred ashes on the forehead by the dear ones which I have no mind to stop or argue in disbelief, and that doesn’t mean I praise the lord but respect their feeling and prevent hurting. I never like hurting anybody and couldn’t do so and not only because it hurt me more than I do, I dare to confront not in fear but love. While I stay away from others religious belief, I can’t stand up the superstitions and will protest when needed.

I grow up from a family that has been pious and my dad never misses a day to worship from the house altar (puja room) and going to temple on weekends. Mom does not miss her Friday worship and any monthly special days of worship apart celebrating festivals, people could wonder how come I differ in thoughts and against their devotional lifestyle. I believe faith can’t be forced on anyone and if it could be only distrustful will remain. Religion or faith should always be individual’s choice to accept or not. As a child one doesn’t have an idea or choice rather following their parents belief until they reach a stage of understanding and realize themselves what they want to be. Obviously I have all the rights already to choose what I want to be, but the only thing was I haven’t exhibited the transformation held within and I don’t think it’s needed anyone to know.

11 comments:

Sandi said...

“I believe faith can’t be forced on anyone”

I believe this too, Jeevan. We have to decide for ourselves. Each person has their journey. Mine led me to faith. I hope and pray yours leads you to happiness. I enjoy your blog and look forward to seeing India through your photos and thoughts here.

Have a peaceful day.

George said...

We spent two weeks exploring the American West this summer, and as I gazed at those magnificent scenes I found it impossible not to believe in God -- that incredible beauty couldn't happen by accident. God isn't found in only temples or churches. I hope your journey through life will continue to lead you to peace and contentment.

Rajesh said...

Yes, I agree with you. Faith cannot be forced on anyone.

Lady Fi said...

So true - faith can't be forced!

KK said...

It is commendable on your part to think beyond religion. Even more importantly, your parents deserve credit for inculcating independence of thought in you, especially in light of their own piousness.

Betsy Adams said...

Hi There, I do think that belief in God is one's own choice... For me, however, I couldn't live my life without knowing that there is a 'higher being' watching over me... I lost a daughter-in-law recently to death. and know that I couldn't have gotten through that time without the love of God surrounding me... This love surrounded me through family, friends, being out in nature and seeing the gorgeous world around me, and just the fact that I KNEW that God was with me and was in control of this crazy world...

IF you find your own peace and consolation --then that is good.... We all have to find our own ways in this life, which include not only the good times but the bad time...

Blessings to you, my Friend.
Hugs,
Betsy

Destination Infinity said...

This is a difficult topic to comment on as my views on God keeps changing with experience. I hope to understand such complex topics better, in the future.

Destination Infinity

carol l mckenna said...

Very insightful post, Jeevan ~ I believe we are all on our own 'path' in this universe and gradually find within what we have been looking outside for ~ You are a precious child of the universe' and all the answers lie within the self.

I find you very intelligent, aware and insightful and that you value what you see, hear, touch, read and respect all and have chosen your own belief. Thanks for being you.

A ShutterBug Explores ~ aka ~ (A Creative Harbor)

Nancy Chan said...

Hi Jeevan, I respect your view and your belief that there is no God. Faith is personal. Whether we believe or not, God is there and God the Creator exists. Just like we can't see the air we breathe, we cannot say that air doesn't exist. My faith in the God I believe in, is not a form of religion but it is experiential relationship with a living God. I hope that one day you will find the one true God who knows what you are going through and wants to love, comfort and protect you. May God's peace be with you.

Sandhya said...

' I have all the rights already to choose what I want to be, but the only thing was I haven’t exhibited the transformation held within and I don’t think it’s needed anyone to know.' Yes!

My children don't believe in god. I is their wish. Every individual has their own interests and beliefs. Let it be.

Twilight Man said...

Jeevan I could feel you and understand your feelings. My best friend who broke his spine after the swimming pool's diving mishap has been been confined to the wheelchair for 33 years now. He has doubts and lost faith too. Please be strong on this matter as we all understand that karma rules.