Wild dream

One night one dream
like a track rolled out train
one moment slipped my heart.

I don’t know who she was
such fair and strange
but she wasn’t whom I expected.
At first sight itself we hold hands
to unknown relationship
to suffer even after awaken

The words that spelled from her
is unexpectedly awe...
her luscious lips spoken way
is the sweetest...
anyhow the proposed place
mentally hesitated me at summit

She hasn’t left my hands holding
beside, sitting closer to me
by someone watching fire in eyes
I couldn’t face here visage
as it expresses love and desire
where I am conflict to answer
for her night proposal

Everyone seems indifferent around
leaving me at undiscerning mind
perhaps I am sustain to love
but unexpected a desire propose
and before it exit or continue
someone woke me arouse.

Beware of dogs

A high target was when tears of joy turn tears of cry. It was news about an 11 year-old boy became a victim in chase of a German shepherd dog. But it bothered me a lot somehow today. May it be an incident or accident, it sent me alarm. Not that we own a pet dog, and it is nothing wrong in having one. But the thing where we had is an apartment complex with tens of houses and neighbors closer enough. May be it wasn’t a frequent incident, but thinking advance is usual sustain and a thing it indicates is prevent further incidents. Like wise I think we were the ones too working on base of violation and how threatening we’re to neighbors with children more or less to the boy. It’s nothing to wonder about if negative thoughts peer into ours neighbors mind after reading this news and I am sure someone would compare us with owing a dog, when even I could.

Dog means fear is a common sense which is more in children and we know a dog chase means we have to stop running, but for children it’s the only thing they know to escape. The above incident is a proof which kept these days as a hidden injury. I could not just blindly deny everything and here is a proof today. Carelessness lost a life indeed. I showed this news to my parents to make them aware and warn about threaten we give to others in complex in name of Maya. We are suspicious about the situation and I am with everyone who agrees for an act on controlling the pets in apartments. Here just walls separate the homes in apartment; the reflection of noise is sustained and oversight is left to injury or loses of life, something happen to the 11-year-old Ashish. I am pity over the incident and regard to the news and violation of rules, I feel its better apart the pet until staying in apartment. Am someone could just voice my expression and agitation to call from beginning to oppose keeping a pet. But none could listen and I left to fate to still believe nothing goes wrong, even after suspect few incidents happened around my complex. There is nothing wrong in having pets at cautious space and more than anything, human life is precious than pets.

Kadamparai Dam and downhill - Valparai!

Day5: Dec 27, 2008

By 9 in morning we stared to climb down the valparai hills after taking some pictures with our relative’s whom accommodate us throughout the stay and some kind of love, to greet us again. I haven’t ever fascinate with such colorful flowers treated my eyes and sense this much like those in the garden home we stayed. It’s bitter to know the group took control the home next day plucked all the flowers that bloomed and smiled at me to reflect. The flower pictures I shared here are those taken at the garden. With half a mind, I left the place saying bye to twitter sweet birds that welcomes morning, the blowing wind in fragrance of tea and the warm gave sunshine. Sign by boards, I peer along the way around the trees where lion tail monkeys are yet to leap. At last with little disappointment we found the elephants near Shivaji estate – belong to late actor Shivaji Ganeshan, and where a couple roaming far away the hill and later to have a group of elephants below the valley and inside the shrubs.

After having cuppa in the waterfalls estate - the last tea garden within valparai before climbing down, we turned right near the 20th hairpin bend that head to Kadamparai Dam. The dam was within a distance of 15/20km, and the road lead between teak forest and Tiger valley. We were stopped by a check post and after hardly convincing the old lady, who was in charge, the block was opened and we passed the upper Aliyar and reached the Kadamparai Power house gateway. This was a power house situated at an invisible site inside the hills! It was a 6km tunnel carved in a single rock, with a passage of two Lorries to come and go! Awe… it was interesting to know the main process of this Power house is to recycle the dam water and generate Hydro Electric power. The very special about this was the recycling process. Throughout day the water from Kadamparai dam is open to generate electricity and throughout night, half the current stored are spend to recycle the water from Upper Aliyar to Kadamparai dam. It was like up to down and down to up.

It was highly restricted and very special permission is needed to go inside the tunnel. Those who have went and came, and who recommend us to visit sounds awesome about the silence and fearful noise, to experience never before and to a multi theater effect. As we had some other plan, we couldn’t visit the Kadamparai dam, which was few km above from the power house gateway. As I have lost the pictures I was covering while climbing up valparai hills, I wish to recapture those scenes and stopped at few places, where the one was Lomes view. From here one get a wonderful view of Aliyar Dam and the zigzag dreadful hairpin bends, and from here above the hill were the only place in valparai I saw the Nilgiri Thar. These are some goats, rarely seen on Western Ghats at the least existence.

There are few waterfalls on the way, the water that arrives from Parambikulam dam in Kerala. One of the falls was such forceful and drizzle on the road, the other with little showers left the children to enjoy. If you remember the Sholayar dams, the water that runs through Kerala and into Parambikulam dam is diverted again into Tamil Nadu and what rushes here as falls. This water is also diverted to Thirumoorthi and Amaravathi Dams. It was a sunny day and as per our plan we head to Thirumoorthi Dam and falls, about 35km from the foot hills. After having lunch at a small town – Tali, and leaving my parents and other to let shower, we spent sometime near the dam banks where lot of people where cooking and taking boat ride on the dam. The place near the falls are much crowded like a village festival and many busses and cab vehicles enter and exit continually wanted me to get away as soon. By evening we visited the Amaravathi Dam! That could be a separate post soon…

Trust and belief

Everybody trusts somebody in the essence of life. Being true to ourselves is also a form of trust and belief, which get us freedom and left fearless to be strong. When I come to think about trust, I felt to believe that humans are the only obvious in life. From my view I see only people around me and even my favorable nature could turn sometime to unwind, but if a person could not attend me I am no more and sprinkle. In trusting something vague and nothing, it’s better to trust a person indeed. Every person is not believed easily and no one could understand like a person indeed. I believed in some people generally and when came to know there true nature I does lost hope, but learned lessons that all passing clouds don’t rain forever. Even though I expected and experienced drought to realize that seasons change and every season have an essence. But what remains eternal was air we breathe and what exist for now.

What we believe is up to our belief and nobody can force somebody to believe something. Even if something exists by a force there we could not find a true belief and something like that I experienced early in my life without my knowledge. Today also I could see some parents insert there belief into there children and wiser people to defuse the young ones uncertain. No person is unbeliever just like that, unless experience the stuff and learn a lesson, and don’t our experience and knowledge rise us up? There was something called god, ones I believed uncertainly and prayed from heart and do things whatever said by parents. My journey drove me through much mirage believed to be true and murmured anything without front thinking and in fear. No one could find out the change in me so easily, because there wasn't much difference in my practice and the change happens inside to invisible to anyone. In love I accept anyone’s wishes and prayers, direct or indirect it was from there heart, but I never pledged to there belief, because I trust them and not there belief.

In friendship trust is more important, what we can’t share with our parents and cousins could be done with a friend. What I shared here is unknown mostly to my dear ones outside blogging and I wonder sometimes why we have a limit with them. We really run within a circle and never thought to go beyond in trusting more like a friend and alike, everyone have a friend to share there secret in trust. In my life I am uncertain with any relationship to trust to bear me as long I and they live, and it was something uneasy for me to think beyond my parents. If I have to say something about my happiness and spirit, is because of being true to myself and my conscience. First we have to trust ourselves, before expecting someone to be true. We trust people up to a boundary and even we have to trust them alone beyond the boundary, which I would to do with no secondary idea.

This post was inspired by Krystyna’s recent blog post.
The picture above was taken on feb 12, at 6 in early morning. The place was Muttukadu Backwater Lake on ECR.

Uneasy movements

Last week I was anxious about my health, because of something gone wrong with my walking which thought me setback. In cause of some events and weekend, I unused the calipers for sometime and when I return to regularly pace, I found difficult in steps further and felt pain at neck. It happens sometime whenever I lack to wear and walk in caliper for some days and thought it was that difficult I could over come next day. But it continues uncertainly for few days, which I couldn’t bear the balance and went to scare in distress perhaps steady uneasy pace. I am using calipers for the last 9 years to walk and to keep in touch with the practice, but from the beginning I had a steady slow reduction in motion, from my own ability to support somebody in walk. Caliper was the only thing worth helpful in the long trail medical indication, that too uphold by a traditional Ayurvedic examiner. I wonder sometimes why the literate allopath doctors couldn’t give more importance to maintain the ability than to discuss always the only unfound medicine and therapists to go on ignoring patients. Something I experience at the medical examinations and parents, doctors and patients meeting conduct by the MD Association.

What the problem at my uneasy pace was just a folded paper is unbelievable. I forget to remember one day I told mom to place a folded paper inside the caliper footwear to increase the balance, but it seem gone overdose to put me into struggle and unbalance, which I suddenly thought to remove on Friday. I was back to normal subsequently to restore fresh breeze and excitement, as it was one of my hopes and pleasure that I merely walk regularly on flat surface. The tough times are those replace with new calipers and I have changed so far three with two going out of size and one broke away while walking. More than me, my uncle was happy to see me out of uneasy and he told he prayed a lot to see me back at comfort and he is one main reason I am still on pace, as he come home regularly on evenings to get me walk some laps inside home. Walking was one great activity stable with me for long, even at least and is believed to maintain the physical adequate.

Another hardship that caught up life last week and still on process was my power wheels. It refuses to operate the system from Monday and no one to take it to service to restore the problem and absence of labor put it further delay. But one thing I realize now and how wonderful it was having a power wheel chair operated by myself put me on individual move. Now I have problem with everyone putting my wheels at position and test patience myself and others to irritate by calling them often to move from one place to another. I call mom and dad to tell; well I brought power wheels so as I avoided anxious and troublesome from you all and kept you away from distress. Wow life was comfort and pleasure with power wheels; I enjoy the freedom it got me and makes less stress to everybody. I hope the wheels are restored soon and catch up with my other activates I miss these days.