An expression of distress

Dad is doing well after the stenting and no breathing difficulties anymore but he’s continues to stay in rest for few more weeks to get back to his regular activities. Thought it feel everything is normal I couldn’t take it easy with my life. I don’t know how to describe or put it in words the pressure I go through internal and it has no business with dad’s health and he’s alright. Like all, I dislike certain things or want to maintain a distance from people whose activities I don’t like or not suit my lifestyle which including my parents. But now life forced me to walk through those which I don’t know is how to unveil. Sometime people are fair and kind, and at next moment breakdown everything to make feel disdain and bad and we can’t blame them for that if that could be their nature, I would stay away, but when it bothers were just going behind them in sake of life. It’s a struggle purely to answer the conscience when accepting assistance physically and mentally couldn’t go through the all. I never thought life would shrink all of sudden when I wasn’t ready or even read the book of my future tense. I know I need to handle this really and I was in the process of planning my future and executing in bits manner but this huge skip is unexpected. This is my second huge leap after the femur fracture in 2013 that put me years ahead into the future, what I have dreamt was only average.

As I have told in my earlier posts, I, mom and dad were like a cycle where any part of the wheel gets an affect the entire cycle will face the challenge. So far I haven’t been to expect somebody to aid me on everyday activities and nature calls, rather occasional; my parents continues to be my saver to drive me all this while and I’m certain they will do it until we’re alive, but I do know I’m in need to look after by someone when they can’t physically support me. Though I know well I need to adjust with life and accept the changes and I too believe this isn’t permanent and I need to find a way if things haven’t change for better. I’m someone who couldn’t stand with people who easily change their mind-set and belief from time to time and draw a rule that frequently turn on and off. It may sound weird but sometime need to believe such people do exists and dealing with them is not easier. It isn’t a problem when taking things physically challenged, but I’m not an insane to feel about anything or insensible to the atrocities happening around me. Perhaps if I was a normal being I could have easily skipped or try to turn down or better, but being a dependent I’m limited and was forced to take things at teeth bite. I don’t know could you understand what I say, but still no problem at least I able to express something here and let you know something disturbing me lot.

Sunday Photos: Sparkle Fun

During Deepavali I took some fun shots, where I asked my dad to move burning sparkle fireworks in random directions to get these shapes. Every year I used to take some snaps using the firework mode on camera, lighting the sparkles to move in different directors to catch some interesting fire traces. This year it was performed on our balcony, so the moves were restricted to get some simple yet interesting ones.

This give me a perspective of first Tamil letter அ (A)

And this looks as Tamil letter ஒ (O)

Skywatch Friday : Pretty Sky

The temperature was mild today, with some clouds covering up the sky and the evening too wasn’t any different until I came inside the home. The sky turned wonderful all of sudden as I looked out the window; it was reddish as I faced west and I just came out instantly clicking some snaps on the sky looking partially purple and pink. We are having a depression in ocean and are expected to receive rains for couple of days during the weekend and as indicate of rain the grey clouds turned up after the play of purple and pink.

Linking this post with Skywatch Friday

Operated on Stents

As you all know the status of my dad, who goes through clogs in coronary artery, was hospitalized yesterday for the stenting and the stents were planted on his heart successfully. We took nearly two weeks’ time to decide from either open heart or placing of stents for the blocks on coronary artery and it wasn’t an easier task as we consulted couple more doctors, open heart has been their first preference but only on our insist they suggest stent as second option and to be done from their referred doctors or hospitals. One of the doctors was strong that open heart is best, but his activities can’t be same and need to be hospitalized for 10 days and more recovery days at home. I know how painful it could be for him if he go through a major operation like open heart and we aren’t in a mind-set to see him suffer from great wounds and feeling sick. So we went back to where we begin, the doctor who guessed and took angiogram to reveal the blocks. He was clear and positive about having stents, and thankfully the major blocks isn’t on the main artery, so his opinion of having stents don’t create serious problems if dad was in controlled diet and continuation of medicine. 

Some report on net says stents aren’t recommended for diabetic patients and those survive on insulin injection. Though my dad was on diabetic for 15 years, which was taken into deep consideration, it was the doctor’s words gave hope and confidence to go for stents. Dad was at CCU from yesterday afternoon to this evening, before shifted to general ward and he’s doing well now and he called me twice after the surgery. Mom and brother were at hospital on exchange duty, where she would be with me at night and visit him on day and same was with brother. My grandmother was at home and my uncles and cousin helps me with day activities. Dad will be discharged tomorrow evening and would be at rest for a month before catch up with regular activities. And being a pensioner the partial amount for stenting will be covered under insurance.  I can’t even image him going through open heart and I’m glad the stents working on him and hope it continues to support him.  

RGB Monday

Colorful Murals

 

Two Sunday’s back, on a drive into the city I come across this colourful paintings or mural on the wall opposite to Nageshwara Rao Park in Mylapore. The painting look like was drawn in attracting kids with natural elements as sun, flowers and critters and further it has some festive scenes or market clips.

Linking this post with Monday Mural